Friendship - Lycan

In a place where dust was once a man,
reality, was always simple.
In a place where human was a man,
reality, was the cruelest dream.

Fear is the thought that holds us down,
and too, the thought that kept us moving.
For fear to exist in the thought of a mind,
gives the advantage on every battle.

Upon shattered shard am I wandering,
in the mirror house of my mind.
For the shards that exist,
is the origin of these trust.

        Humans are fools, don't you agree? They never think from other people's angle, they only think that they're right, and wrong on other people. They never thought why would this happen, they only thought, why does he act like that? What is wrong with him?

        Why can't human consider from other people's mind? Why won't they think that they are the ones who could possibly be the one who is wrong at start? Why does human have to be this idiotic?! Why won't they think that whether will their spoken words will hurt other's feelings?

        Every human has felt pain, who doesn't? But every external pain can be eventually cured, only those pain in the inside can't be cured... Many people can't endure too much pain, if pain accumulates too much in one's heart, they'll find a way to overcome it. But the inner pain in my heart, no, it is not a stab, not a slash, nor is it a bullet pierced, but ruptured...

        Pain is the only thing that enables one to grow, but of course, it will cause opposite effects if it accumulates too much. My pain even caused me to realize four parts of me:

• The 1st aspect, Loneliness carrier, the Heart, is me who is kind to others and takes in every blame

• The 4th aspect, Emptiness carrier, the Soul, is me who is ready to let go of everything, even emotions

• The 5th aspect, Despair carrier, the Vessel, is me who wish to be able to be able to survive in any situation and withstand any given problems

• The 8th aspect, Insanity carrier, the Mind, is me who is thirsting for adrenaline

        Most people will avoid feeling pain as it is the worst feeling every felt to every single human... For me, I take in all the blame and recall everything I've done in the past before approaching that one again. For someone who has lost all hope, we just walk straight on our path, letting go of anything that wishes to leave, if we saw a slight light of hope, we assume it as an illusion, nothing more and continues to walk straight... I too, hate pain, but I know that pain is the only thing that enables one to grow, one who doesn't feel pain can't truly survive this cruelty world. And so I  defy my own feelings, and went in search of pain, in order to grow...

        This action of mine, has dealt an extreme pain to me, so painful that I hesitated before I did the choice... It was painful, but it was for your good, I think it'll be better this way, I won't have to break my promise in this way too. I'll take on the pain, so please live your life... Happily...

        Solitude... It has always been with me from the start, it helped me in many aspects... But as I grow, I'm starting to feel like escaping from this feeling... I wan't to have more friends... I've struggled very hard, and finally, I've succeeded. 

        Even so, right now, I've realized that my mind only comes when i'm in loneliness... I'm at my best when I'm lonely, whenever I'm lonely, everything comes to mind again, enabling me to absorb every detail and information of my conversations at school and my teacher's teaching, when I'm alone, I'm able to think further from many angles...

        Right now, I have only a single wish, and that's to go to a highland, living there alone with my mind, without any care of disturbance... I as well wish to have a pack that I can live with... To live in solitude, is my only option...